20 Signs a Stay At Home Mom Might Be Ready To Return To The Workforce

I’m in that transition period–the one year itch, you could call it.  My little Lady is about to turn one, so now what?  Do I continue to just be a stay at home mom?  Do I return to work?  When “the itch” started with Man I was already pregnant with Lady; it seemed silly to go back to work for such a short period of time.  But I’m not having any other kids and I’m not so sure being a SAHM is the right fit for me.  I’m not quite sure where I belong.

I have so many versions of this blog already written; “Being a SAHM, The Unvarnished Truth!” and other similar titles.   I was going to write some secret expose about how extremely difficult it truly is but they all came out sounding depressing and like a complaint.  I will say that I understand how lucky I am to actually have a choice. Many moms do not.  This is why there is no blog needed to explain just how tough it is, how lonely it can be, and that feeling of wanting something slightly more intellectual than just wiping butts all day.

There have been some signs though recently that have been pushed me toward the direction of returning to work, or at least getting out more!

These are the top 20 signs it might be time for a stay at home mom to return to the workforce:

  1. You have already made six picture collages of the kids and it’s only breakfast time.
  2. Downloading the picture collage app was the previous day’s highlight.
  3. It’s 10AM and the only other adult you have communicated with is the pharmacist to refill your Xanax prescription.
  4. You know that Michael Strahan replaced Regis on Live! With Kelly and Michael… and you actually find him quite charming.
  5. You’re a little too excited when the last season of the original 90210 ends and “the Brenda years” finally return to Soap Net. (Seriously, a little Season One and the day’s stresses just melt away.)
  6. The thought of preschool vacation makes you break out into a cold sweat.
  7. You blog as an outlet!
  8. Your kids automatically line up in the kitchen at 5PM, like the little Pavlovian dogs they are, and wait for high fives as mommy opens her beer.
  9. Your afternoon is made because there is a great chick flick on.
  10. Cooking dinner at the end of a long day actually seems appealing because it’s something other than watching the same episode of Dino Train for the fifth time.
  11. You live on Facebook because when you’re in your third consecutive hour of building block towers or “jamming,” what else are you going to do to take a mental break?
  12. Crazy thoughts creep into your head that might actually cause you to consider having a third child; I mean, three is the new two.  [Editor’s note: No more kids.]
  13. Saturday feels like a Tuesday.
  14. You get really into exercise and your regular workout no longer satisfies this intensely weird desire you have to be pushed to your physical limit.
  15. You’ve become a super-competitive Words With Friends player.  Go ahead, challenge me.
  16. You buy new toys based on your own level of interest as opposed to the needs/wants of your child.
  17. Accidents that involve cleaning up poop don’t faze you at all.
  18. You start wishing minor illnesses on yourself because a little forced R&R might be nice.
  19.  You write fan letters to other blogging moms because you think they might be the only people who really understand you… and they don’t write back.
  20. You use words like, poopy, boogie, tushy, time out, potty, etc. in everyday conversation.
  21. When your most mentally challenging task that day was completing a four piece animal puzzle.

Whatever road I take next for now it’s play dates, diapers, bottles, nap times, tantrums, chicken nuggets, boogies, Elmo’s World, stickey cheeks,snuggles, laughs, messes, and more.  Maybe I will cherish this time with them for just a little while longer.

An example of my awesome collages.

An example of my awesome collages.

One thought on “20 Signs a Stay At Home Mom Might Be Ready To Return To The Workforce

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