Laurie Berkner, My New Best Friend

It’s been a little over 7 months since I have last published a blog.  I have sat down dozens of times to write, but every time I do, someone needs a diaper change, a meal, a nap, a bottle, a play partner, a ride to school… you see where I am headed.  By the time I get back to the blog I am tired, frustrated, and uninspired; hence the 12 unfinished blogs on my desktop.

Seven months ago I gave birth to Lady.  She happens to be an angel; however, the task of taking care of two babies 18 months apart in age has proven to be immense.  It has been a very difficult adjustment to say the least, but you don’t need to hear about the sleep deprivation, the double diaper duty, the lack of alone time…  You get it. You have kids.

In order to get through this phase of life I have developed some savory and some unsavory coping mechanisms.

My addiction to Facebook is unsavory!  I post to it, I read it, I take pictures for it, I Instagram it.  I comment on it, I like it, I tweet it, and I update it.  No one really needs to know that my child just tried to get a yogurt puff into her mouth, or that I got to sleep past 7AM, but I just can’t help myself and that’s the way it is.  I read status updates about your jobs; you can read status updates about mine!

My love of wine and beer is unsavory!  I always liked a good beer or a great glass of wine. Now I love several good beers and great glasses of wine.

My new obsession with Laurie Berkner is savory!  Laurie, I love you.  I love you because you entertain Man every time I pop you in the DVD player or bring up a song on YouTube.  You are my savior.  In a pinch, I can always go to Laurie for advice.  Like when Man spills his milk on the table when I’m not looking. Instead of getting mad, I just sing, “I’m a mess, I’m a mess, I’m a big old messy mess!”  If Laurie thinks it’s ok to be a mess then it must be.

You know how Laurie wears a pig on her head? And how she keeps it there all day?  Well, Man now wears his “tiger fuzzy” on his head… and he keeps it there all day.  When he first took all of the stuffing out of his tiger stuffed animal and started wearing it over his face like he was Hannibal Lecter,  it freaked me out a bit.  But then I realized he was just wearing his tiger on his head, like wonderful Laurie and her special head-sitting pig.

If Victor Vito and Freddie Vasco can eat a burrito with Tabasco, then Man can darn well try a hot dog.  Man weighs 21 pounds… he is two.  He is super-skinny and it scares me.  He eats the same five things and this annoys me, but when Laurie mentions some of the strange things that her friends eat, Man is often willing to try something new.  He never likes it, but he tries it, and that’s all Laurie and I can ask for.

Don’t think my little Lady doesn’t love Laurie as well.  You know why??  Because it occupies her big brother long enough for Mommy to give her some special attention; most of which is sucked out of the room when Man is awake.

I can happily listen to Laurie all day, much like any of my other favorite bands.  I have a friend who works at a popular magazine and she told me that Laurie might do a meet and greet; my reaction was comparable to a tween that was just told that One Direction was coming to town–there might have been screaming, tears of joy, and begging for autographs.  We are going to see Laurie live in December*, and one of my favorite “adult” bands in February… you can guess who I am more excited to see?

*I considered making a poster so she could spot us all the way in the back. I have wisely decided to spare my family and friends the humiliation.

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