Why didn’t someone tell me to buy the absolute cheapest changing table possible?? The table itself became obsolete at about month six; actually it was used more as a storage unit, a very large, ugly, obvious, storage unit.
Once Man started to roll over, changing him on the table became a circus act. Initially, we were able to hold him down using one arm and do the change with the other. I know; why didn’t we use that strap that came with the table to just, well, strap him down?? First: It just seems weird to me to strap my child down flat to anything, even if it is for safety purposes. It conjures up bad images of terrible parenting, I can hear the sirens of the Child Protective Services vehicle speeding down the street to come and save Man from the strap!! And Second: At that point Man weighed 13 pounds, we could have folded him over twice and he still would have been able to slither out from under the strap. I did, however, use it as a distraction for a while, letting man hit me with it while I changed him at lightning speed.
Once he started to sit up independently it was a completely different story: I no longer felt comfortable changing him on the table at all. He would proudly sit himself up and crane to see over the side (most likely checking out the dirty diaper he had thrown to the floor), looking back up at me as if to say, “Hey mom, I’m really high up and it feel dangerous…AWESOME!!” From then on floors, carpets, rugs, mats…well anything close to the floor became our changing table.
Crawling and standing brought the next challenge. How do I make Man stay still on his back long enough to get a diaper changed (let alone clothes on)? The answer was simple!! I don’t!!! I began to develop other techniques…
The Wrap and Sit: Make sure to have the diaper placed properly between the legs and then when the baby inevitably sits you wrap and fasten tabs around the waist.
Pros: Your baby is going to sit no matter what you do to keep him (or her) standing so you might as well master it!
Cons: You can never get the diaper high enough on the tummy while in the seated position, and in the end it looks like they are wearing bikini underwear.
The Stand and Pray: This is where you set up some toys on a bench or a play table and simply pray that the baby remains standing while you put on the diaper. Incidentally, the diaper gods must have been pissed at me the other day because the “pray” portion of this technique failed… twice… in two hours… it was a particularly messy day.
Pros: Obviously, you get the diaper on properly while the baby happily entertains him/herself. Very effective!
Cons: 1) It’s much harder to clean all up in their shit (no pun intended) (this happens to be a con for The Wrap and Sit as well)
2) Most of the time they sit and then crawl away before they are cleaned and re-diapered.
*Maybe you have to really be a deeply religious person for this strategy to work best?
The Two-Person Stand: This is where one person holds the baby up while the other does the diapering.
Pros: Again, a very effective way to diaper an active baby.
Cons: Success depends on both people. That means actual teamwork; if you have someone who lets the baby squirm then putting the diaper on is impossible. Conversely, if the diaperer can’t change the baby quickly enough then it becomes difficult to hold a squirming baby.
I’m sure many of you have developed your own methods; whatever they are I hope they work because diapering is serious and challenging business. Sometimes it seems as if Man and I are just waiting each other out… a diaper stand off of sort, since he always waits to go “Numero Dos” until he’s wearing a fresh one. I know he has to go; he knows he has to go…but he just won’t until I have laboriously chased him around the room with a fresh diaper, having just failed in my attempt at the Wrap and Sit. Once I finally get it on, about a minute later he does his business. And I swear, he laughs knowing that I have to change him again practically immediately. We were at a birthday party recently where someone commented that I changed him so often; I must like to keep him clean… No, he just one won the stand off this time!
Share some of your unique diaper changing techniques!